"To Catch a Predator" Catches a Predator

Written by Chad Messer

Friday, 13 June 2008

Catholic Girl and Predator Charlotte, NC – Executive producers of Dateline NBC's To Catch a Predator were surprised and horrified when an internet sting in the Charlotte suburb of King's Mountain netted something much more than the usual creepy pedophile.

By all accounts, this sting started out like all of the others. When moving into a new area for a series of tapings, Dateline works with the local authorities to set up a dummy house that will be used as both bait and headquarters. Microphones and cameras are typically hidden in the kitchen, and local law enforcement sets up a hidden perimeter around the neighborhood. The Charlotte-area taping was supposed to be no different.

“Everything was looking good,” said Gerry Barker, one of Dateline's line producers. “Then the perp showed up, and all hell broke loose.”

“We lured the guy in by pretending to be a naughty 13-year old Catholic schoolgirl who wanted a more...primal education,” said Chris Hansen, To Catch a Predator's host. “He was supposed to show up and talk dirty, like all the other perverts we catch, but this one was different.”

Different, indeed. The raw footage that was rescued from the dummy house shows a gruesome alien creature over 7 feet tall knocking on the back door, a box of condoms and a bouquet of flowers hidden behind his back. The undercover policewoman who is posing as the 13-year old girl invites him in, and leaves him to wait for her on a bar stool while she puts in a load of laundry.

At this point in the episode, the pedophile is left alone for a few seconds and Chris Hansen enters the kitchen to begin a lecture on how pedophilia is wrong, even though it gets good ratings. During this episode, however, that lecture never started.

As soon as the alien saw Hansen, it leaped up on the kitchen counter and started throwing razor-sharp blades at the host, which he narrowly avoided. The commotion brought the policemen out of their hiding places and, after a grueling battle that left 12 Charlotte-Mecklenburg police officers without spines, the Predator was subdued and is currently awaiting trial.

“If only we could have had Governor Swarzenegger here or beloved character actor Danny Glover here, those 12 officers might still be with us,” said police Chief Bwantu Mubaze. “Fighting an alien pedophile just reminds you how small we are as a species, in the grand scheme of things. And how hot Catholic schoolgirls can be, too.”

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